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4월 2014

The Last Time I Lied

2014년 4월 10일 목요일 2

Since I was little, I was told that lying was bad. My parents told me to never be a liar whether I succeed or not. Well, lying do bring consequences. It may lower your reputation, it may cost a friend. It is true that many people cannot handle those aftereffects. Reputation in society occupied a huge part in my parent’s lesson. It was reasonable, since they wanted me to become a man of society. Man of society was all good and fair, but lying somehow became part of my life. It became the motivation that drove me to this point. There is a saying that the position makes the person. We adapt to the position we are in. Lies were the position I molded myself. Because I lied, I was able to acquire all these peculiar skills that made me stand out in a crowd. And those skills, helped me design my future self. Sometimes I ask myself nowadays, am I still lying? Truth to be told, yes I do lie and I’ve already embraced it as part of my life, a part of my catalyst that I cannot give up on.
The last time I lied, it was because I wanted to feel welcomed. Halfway through year 2013 was the time I ventured online for more facebook groups to endorse myself in. Somehow I wandered into an EDM producers group. It was fascinating at first. I’ve only dreamed of making music but these people put that into action. They didn’t go to private institution to learn these things but they made high-quality songs with different styles and genre. I want to be them. I wanted them to know that someone like me existed. I wanted my name engraved on their memory. So I wrote a very fancy personal introductory post on the group. The post lied about me being able to produce all kinds of music. It had me producing dubstep, trance, hiphop beats and so on. It made me look like some master producer who can cover a whole variety of EDM genre. The lie was too huge to cover so I had to quickly rewrite the post, this time reducing the genre to dubstep and hiphop beats. They bought it. They were utterly interested in me. They wanted to hear my music, my tunes. Since they were people I respected, I didn’t want to run away from this chance to get closer to them. That’s how I first stepped into music production. Honestly, it was a very interesting process. Starting from the bottom and rising to the point where I can actually utilize what I learned in 2 weeks was hard but worthwhile. In the process I acquired some very helpful and humble friends who stood by my side as I went through the whole progress, and also got accepted into the community.
At this point, I can never tell whether this skill will be useful for my future or not, but this experience was something I never could have earned by living a very straight life. I am not saying lying is bad but for me, lying could be a key for a much broader opportunity.

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